During a time-traveling trek back to July 3, 1776, Erbert and Gerbert learned that the biggest threat to our fledgling nation wasn’t the British, but a certain evil comet. You see, just as all of the Continental Congressmen were about to put their John Hancocks on the Declaration of Independence, evil Comet Morehouse, who hated life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, swooped in and tried to burn it right up. Luckily for all of us, Jacob Bluefinger, the inkwell-fillerupper at Independence Hall, grabbed the document and handed it off to an eagle, who soared up into the sky, putting out the fire and saving the Declaration for future generations. And while young Jacob may have become a forgotten historical footnote, the heroic eagle became our national symbol.
